The party has to end sometime
by Notebook
I haven't exactly had a conventional life. But I've been leading one for the past five years or so. There's nothing inherently wrong with that. But if i'm honest with myself it has been grating a little. I've been trying to get MBH interested in hiking and maybe kayaking. She's pretty keen on the idea of camping. Not too sure about the hiking part yet. Sometimes you need a goal to work to, so I thought about some holiday ideas for next year.
Pamplona – running with the bulls. Hey why not? If you're going to go to somewhere like Spain then do something interesting. The thought of lying on a beach for a week fills me with dread. MBH is pretty much dead set against this idea. Even though I told her it would just mean sipping Sangria and watching for her. Still very against it though. I don't get the danger. Faced with a choice of running like the wind or a bull horn up the arse I'll take running like the wind any day. It's on the route of the Camino de Santiago and she is very interested in doing that. But I'd rather do that in Spring than July when the crowds are there. But the bulls don't run in Spring.
Trekking in Iceland. Iceland is a beautiful place. Not the most popular of tourist destinations so not too spoilt. I was thinking a week or so next July, August (August if I can convince her on Pamplona).
MBH initially was really positive about this. But then came the bombshell. If we're going to have kids next year then Iceland is not going to be possible. And she really wants kids. And she's really, really serious this time.
Don't get me wrong. I do too. Truth be told I'm leaving it way late. I'm certainly not expecting to live to see my kids get to my age. MBH is younger than me so not so much of an issue. But over the years the attitude has definitely changed from “Oh no not now!” to “Now, now, NOW!!!”
Damn clock.
I know I've run out of time and excuses. I'm going to have to sit down with myself and have a good think. Like I said, I do want children. But god almighty Parents are bloody boring for a good few years at the start. I'm sure people would say “Ha! That'll be you too!” But I'm really not sure it will be. Family friendly holidays…sigh. I'd rather take my kid to interesting places. See the World for a bit. I didn't when I was growing up and I've been making up for it for the past three decades. But there's always the worry that you get a lobotomy at the maternity ward and life just becomes a never ending cycle of the mundane.
Maybe, maybe not. Time for a think.
“Dad, you wrote that life would be mundane when you had kids. Has it been mundane?”
“No” you’ll say, “not by a long way”.
You get to introduce someone to the world, to see their wonder, shape their being. You share their experiences, you both share new ones. You learn about them and they teach you about yourself.
Life is boring unless you make it not so and parenting is the same. Having a kid gives you permission to do lots of things that kids do too because you now have an excuse to play on the swings, make a mess, pull faces, act daft.
Life is not worse with kids. It’s just different.
Meh, I’m still not sure. I’m already awesome at making a mess (have half a dozen canvasses I want to get started on but MBH goes mental at the mess) and pulling faces and acting daft – yup that too
I dunno – maybe it’s just getting used to that big a change. It has been just me and then MBH for a long, long time. It’s not like I’m in my twenties and don’t have a clue anymore.
Maybe just teaching an old dog new tricks…