My life for the past four days. To say my patience is a teeny bit thin is an understatement. Apparently an engineer is coming tomorrow. Why? No idea because the problem is with the ISP or in the area.

MBH came back in this evening after being out with her friends for swimming. About the third thing she said when she came back was “What if we start looking back in the old area again?”

Gah! Women. I know for a fact her friends will have been bending her ear that we’re potentially moving further out. By further out I mean an extra 30 FUCKING MINUTES in the car. Dear God – they will all have me in the nut house. Don’t get me started that one of the girls is considering moving to New York!

Men may be from Mars, but Women are definitely from the Planet of Zero Common Sense.

[Deep Breath]

I still love them all though, but sometimes…

This image has been all over the Internet but I think it’s a great way of summing it all up.

Well said Mr Eastwood. Then I heard what Archbishop Diarmuid Martin had to say when asked to comment on Obamas stance:

“The Churches teaching is very clear. In the nature of sexuality is this mutuality between a man and a woman. It goes back to the original teaching beginning in the Book of Genesis where God created the human race..male and female…he created them.”

Fucks sake. This is the same book that had talking snakes in it? Give me a break. That attitude to me makes this no different from Scientology – solid and unequivocal belief in a book. I was also reading about the Catholic Church in Ireland moaning about the lack of priests and that existing priests were in their 60′s, 70′s and 80′s. So what were they going to do when the priesthood diminished?

Well one of the greatest certainties in this Universe, is that everything must come to an end. The Catholic Church shows absolutely no signs of adapting. So from an evolutionary aspect (which some religious folk would deny…which is priceless ) they will cease to be.

I won’t shed a tear. I’m not an atheist but organised religion certainly has a lot to answer for.

So that is the plan for this weekend. I probably won’t be putting it up here. Maybe. I think I might put it on another site. I have a Vimeo account open and just ready – can’t stand Youtube for that.

Saying that though, some decent nuggets have come out of courses where initially my BS sensor is working overtime. Let me try and put the crux of one of them into a concept:

Everybody has a natural personality and tendencies. Be that creative, analytical, extrovert or introvert (if we consider ends of different scales). However, just because that is your natural tendency – it does not mean you aren’t capable of performing at the other end of the scale – so to speak. So as an example – creative people can be very analytical, and introverted people can be very extrovert. The key factor is how much mental energy it takes to successfully do that. The greater (or longer) you have to ‘perform’ at the other end of the scale – the more energy you expend doing it. A final, more specific example, could be doing presentations or speeches for half a day. A natural extrovert could use just a little bit of energy for this. A natural introvert could give as good a speech (or presentation) but be absolutely shattered afterwards.

That’s me trying to distill what I picked up from a course I attended ages ago. If you start to think about where you naturally lie on scales like that then when you have to deal with situations that require you to move from where you would naturally fit, you can understand what will tire you out and plan accordingly.

Personally, I’m naturally a very undiplomatic person and if something or someone pisses me off then the entire world knows about it because it’s plainly obvious. In my day job there can be a lot of diplomacy required, and, because we live in a civilised world you can’t always say what you mean. Or be as obvious when you aren’t entirely happy. But I know that and if I’m going through a lengthy period needing that, then I know I’m going to be tired.

I’m actually quite good at it in a work environment now. There’s only been a couple of occasions where I’d actually thought “Oh dear, could have controlled that” but after asking close colleagues they hadn’t noticed at all. I have perfected the art of seething inside! Of course I end up absolutely knackered.

MBH tells me I’ve missed my calling. I would have been perfect in the Military or as a Lawyer cross examining someone until they broke down. So you can imagine the amount of energy I expend in the Corporate World

Lately I have had to do a LOT of talking and building relationships. The fuckhead phrase for it would be ‘Reaching out’ and (ick) ‘Socialising’ concepts and ideas. What’s frustrating me is at the end of the day I have literally ran out of words. I cannot hold a conversation about anything that isn’t incredibly interesting or just plain frivolous. I’m fucked if we had a party to go to where we were to meet people and have polite conversations right now because I would absolutely be known as ‘that antisocial, and frankly, a little scary bugger’. I would not have the energy to have a polite but meaningless conversation. 99% chance I’d blurt out “Dear God! You are boring/an imbecile/fucking moronic” [delete as appropriate].

Not a problem. Just need a bit of a rest, but my brain right is refusing to cooperate. I have a lot of ideas, thoughts and whatever floating around that I want to explore. But zero energy after work to do it. So they just float around and continue to build up.

Definitely looking forward to a few days away. Prices be damned but I’ve booked MBH and myself a few days in Rome in a few weeks. Wow. Airline prices are starting to get a bit silly. But Rome is one of the only places in the World that acts like a pressure release for me. Within hours of getting there you can pratically hear the hiss of stress leaving me. It’s only four days away but it always feels like double that.

Can’t. Wait.